Today I was a little anxious again because I took Jack to a playground area at the local shopping centre and I was worried what the other kids might be like and how Jack may react (he is big on personal space and if you encroach some biting may ensue). I need not have worried. Jack had a blast! He even made a connection with a girl a year or two older than him. They were chasing the birds flying over head, giggling and squealing with delight. Then when they came to the fence, they stopped and looked at eachother!! Jack looked another child in the eyes!! Then as I watched, my heart skipped a beat, my inner monologue said "Please don't bite her" as he slowly approached her.... then he reached out and touched her dress. I breathed a sigh of relief. I then puffed up in pride. My son, the sly casanova... ok so maybe I'm going a bit OTT here, but I was truly blown away. Jack dislikes other kids in his play space. Today he didn't mind sharing that space with an 'older woman'.
Tuesday, 28 June 2011
Children at play...
I always get a bit nervous taking the children to play areas, parks and Softplay type of venues.. Mainly because I worry about the interaction between my children and other children causing an issue, and so the parents of the other children will then create an issue with me. It has happened in the past, when I was defending Liam from some bullying children at Softplay. I simply told them to "Stop throwing balls at my son's head" in a stern voice, and then I got attacked by their mother. After that incident I really didn't want to go to any of these places. But a few years have passed and I think I have a bit more of a thicker head skin. So I have managed to brave some of these venues once more.
Today I was a little anxious again because I took Jack to a playground area at the local shopping centre and I was worried what the other kids might be like and how Jack may react (he is big on personal space and if you encroach some biting may ensue). I need not have worried. Jack had a blast! He even made a connection with a girl a year or two older than him. They were chasing the birds flying over head, giggling and squealing with delight. Then when they came to the fence, they stopped and looked at eachother!! Jack looked another child in the eyes!! Then as I watched, my heart skipped a beat, my inner monologue said "Please don't bite her" as he slowly approached her.... then he reached out and touched her dress. I breathed a sigh of relief. I then puffed up in pride. My son, the sly casanova... ok so maybe I'm going a bit OTT here, but I was truly blown away. Jack dislikes other kids in his play space. Today he didn't mind sharing that space with an 'older woman'.
Today I was a little anxious again because I took Jack to a playground area at the local shopping centre and I was worried what the other kids might be like and how Jack may react (he is big on personal space and if you encroach some biting may ensue). I need not have worried. Jack had a blast! He even made a connection with a girl a year or two older than him. They were chasing the birds flying over head, giggling and squealing with delight. Then when they came to the fence, they stopped and looked at eachother!! Jack looked another child in the eyes!! Then as I watched, my heart skipped a beat, my inner monologue said "Please don't bite her" as he slowly approached her.... then he reached out and touched her dress. I breathed a sigh of relief. I then puffed up in pride. My son, the sly casanova... ok so maybe I'm going a bit OTT here, but I was truly blown away. Jack dislikes other kids in his play space. Today he didn't mind sharing that space with an 'older woman'.
Saturday, 25 June 2011
sometimes music taste says a lot about a person...
I just wonder what it says about me...
I am known to love a very wide variety of styles and sounds.
Do you think listing your top 10 favourite "Albums of Your Time" could really represent who you are?? Well I'm feeling pop/rock reflective tonight. So here goes my Top 10 (in no particular order, because that would be too hard to decide on):
Now my choices were made by thinking about the albums that I have listened to many, many times and am still not sick of. That make me feel good. Make me smile. The ones that make me do a roundhouse kick in the air 'cos I feel like I could conquer the world. The ones that make me flip my hair and pout like a sexy minx, making me think I'm a sexy she-devil. And of course the ones that contain music that make me cry beautiful tears.
Ok so maybe I shouldn't limit it to 10 (or the extra 5 on the soundtrack list), because these two lists don't even begin to touch on my extensive music choices. But this is definately a good sampler *insert winky face*.
I am known to love a very wide variety of styles and sounds.
Do you think listing your top 10 favourite "Albums of Your Time" could really represent who you are?? Well I'm feeling pop/rock reflective tonight. So here goes my Top 10 (in no particular order, because that would be too hard to decide on):
- Beastie Boys 'Hello Nasty' 1998
- Pearl Jam 'Ten' 1991
- The White Stripes 'Elephant' 2003
- Radiohead 'OK Computer' 1997
- Outkast 'Speakerboxxx/Love Below' 2003
- The Killers 'Sam's Town' 2006
- The Prodigy 'Their Law' 2005
- The Strokes 'Room on Fire' 2003
- Garbage 'Garbage' 1995
- Nirvana 'Nevermind' 1991
- Reservoir Dogs
- Spawn
- Dawn of the Dead (remake)
- Trainspotting
- Pulp Fiction
Now my choices were made by thinking about the albums that I have listened to many, many times and am still not sick of. That make me feel good. Make me smile. The ones that make me do a roundhouse kick in the air 'cos I feel like I could conquer the world. The ones that make me flip my hair and pout like a sexy minx, making me think I'm a sexy she-devil. And of course the ones that contain music that make me cry beautiful tears.
Ok so maybe I shouldn't limit it to 10 (or the extra 5 on the soundtrack list), because these two lists don't even begin to touch on my extensive music choices. But this is definately a good sampler *insert winky face*.
Friday, 24 June 2011
Going into his world...
It does seem to be what my life is about at the moment... Jack and his world. I mean I'm not ignoring or neglecting Liam and Evangeline. But I certainly have this part of me that is very consumed in Jack and his needs at the moment. I think it may be partly to do with how important this time is in his development. How integral it is for us to 'nip things in the bud'. The truth is 'Early Intervention' has proven to be of the utmost importance in the treatment of Autism or any disability for that matter. As soon as that diagnosis is given, there should be no time wasted. While their brains are growing at a very fast rate, it is vital we change the 'pathways' and 'rewire'.
In Jack's case we have to focus on Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy (with Liam it is both of those plus Physio Therapy). At the moment in speech we are focussing on gaining Jack's eye contact and in Occupational Therapy we will be focussing on his sensory needs. Currently we meet with the therapists once a fortnight.
Now we have been lucky enough to know an amazing mum who made a trip to the United States to take part in a special program created by the Autism Treatment Center of America that has helped parents of children with Autism to 'unlock their child's mind'. It is called the Son-Rise Program. Now this is a very intensive form of therapy. Intensive, due to the extreme focus on the individual child, all day, everyday. But what I love about this program is that it is all about connections, about going into the child's world and enjoying it! Then once the child shares their world with you, you slowly pull them into our world. It totally makes sense! And I'm already seeing how it is effective...
One of the brochures my friend came back with from the Autism Treatment Center of America, was how to "Kick-Start Your Son-Rise Program". There were 3 simple techniques:
I won't be able to do the intensive program. And I think Jack may do well without the intensive, but I think applying a lot of the principles as much as possible will make a great impact on him. Yet I may have to have a meeting with those in Jack's life, to educate them on how to interact with him. How to 'get into his world'.
My friend, the amazing mum who took a leap of faith and went to the States, is embarking on the actual Son-Rise Program with her beautiful son and in doing so she needs volunteers. I have offered my energetic, effervescent self for 2 hours a week. In those two hours I will be one on one with her son. I am so excited to be apart of the 'unlocking' of this little boy. I am looking forward to seeing this program in action and in doing so I hope to further educate myself on treating Autism. Not only for helping Jack. But through all this I think I have found my calling... I would love to work in Early Intervention therapies for Autism Spectrum Disorder. I finally figured out what I want to do in life!!!! I already 'get' their world. I would be perfect in making that 'bridge' between the 2 worlds.
It just shows.. EVERYTHING is meant to be.
In Jack's case we have to focus on Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy (with Liam it is both of those plus Physio Therapy). At the moment in speech we are focussing on gaining Jack's eye contact and in Occupational Therapy we will be focussing on his sensory needs. Currently we meet with the therapists once a fortnight.
Now we have been lucky enough to know an amazing mum who made a trip to the United States to take part in a special program created by the Autism Treatment Center of America that has helped parents of children with Autism to 'unlock their child's mind'. It is called the Son-Rise Program. Now this is a very intensive form of therapy. Intensive, due to the extreme focus on the individual child, all day, everyday. But what I love about this program is that it is all about connections, about going into the child's world and enjoying it! Then once the child shares their world with you, you slowly pull them into our world. It totally makes sense! And I'm already seeing how it is effective...
One of the brochures my friend came back with from the Autism Treatment Center of America, was how to "Kick-Start Your Son-Rise Program". There were 3 simple techniques:
- Spend 30 minutes a day with your child (uninterrupted)
- 'Join' your child (do exactly what your child is doing and focus on enjoying time in 'their world')
- Focus on eye contact (place all objects that you are using in the interaction close to your eyes, to create eye contact)
I won't be able to do the intensive program. And I think Jack may do well without the intensive, but I think applying a lot of the principles as much as possible will make a great impact on him. Yet I may have to have a meeting with those in Jack's life, to educate them on how to interact with him. How to 'get into his world'.
My friend, the amazing mum who took a leap of faith and went to the States, is embarking on the actual Son-Rise Program with her beautiful son and in doing so she needs volunteers. I have offered my energetic, effervescent self for 2 hours a week. In those two hours I will be one on one with her son. I am so excited to be apart of the 'unlocking' of this little boy. I am looking forward to seeing this program in action and in doing so I hope to further educate myself on treating Autism. Not only for helping Jack. But through all this I think I have found my calling... I would love to work in Early Intervention therapies for Autism Spectrum Disorder. I finally figured out what I want to do in life!!!! I already 'get' their world. I would be perfect in making that 'bridge' between the 2 worlds.
It just shows.. EVERYTHING is meant to be.
Monday, 20 June 2011
No shame...
Yes people I feel no shame whatsoever when it comes my kids or myself. In actual fact I embrace the things that set them apart from the rest. For example today, I was out to lunch with Knight in Shining Armour and Evangeline (aka Little) and Jack (aka Mr Middle). Jack was (as my husband likes to refer to it as) stimming his balls off. Lots of rocking and humming, playing with his hands and shaking his head. Now some people may sit there and feel embaressed, thinking "Why can't my child behave normally?". But in our case, hubby and I just looked at eachother and beamed. Mr Middle was happy as can be. We could enjoy our lunch for a start and we had awesome entertainment to boot! I had no idea if anyone was watching because I never checked and quite frankly didn't give two hoots if anyone was.
I have come to this place of understanding... I do not want to have my child be like everyone else. I do not want to be like everyone else myself. This isn't about being non-conforming. This is about being yourself without harming others or yourself. This is about having a comfortable space within one's own world. So what if you need to play with your hair to feel 'safe' or if your child needs to cover their ears when the noise becomes too overwhelming. Does it hurt others to do this? The only thing it might hurt is somebody's sense of normality. But as we all say these days "what is normal?".
I say celebrate what sets us and our children apart from the rest! I say yell it from the roof tops! Embrace what makes us unique! If we as adults can show how awesome it is to do this, our children will follow suit! Maybe then we can eradicate bullying and prejudice. Oh a world where we can be excited to share our eccentricities rather than hide those quirky differences. And believe you, me, we ALL have quirks and eccentricities.
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I have come to this place of understanding... I do not want to have my child be like everyone else. I do not want to be like everyone else myself. This isn't about being non-conforming. This is about being yourself without harming others or yourself. This is about having a comfortable space within one's own world. So what if you need to play with your hair to feel 'safe' or if your child needs to cover their ears when the noise becomes too overwhelming. Does it hurt others to do this? The only thing it might hurt is somebody's sense of normality. But as we all say these days "what is normal?".
I say celebrate what sets us and our children apart from the rest! I say yell it from the roof tops! Embrace what makes us unique! If we as adults can show how awesome it is to do this, our children will follow suit! Maybe then we can eradicate bullying and prejudice. Oh a world where we can be excited to share our eccentricities rather than hide those quirky differences. And believe you, me, we ALL have quirks and eccentricities.
Sunday, 19 June 2011
oh God...
They say not to discuss religion, politics or sex with friends. And it's true that it can cause great debate and sometimes end friendships. But tonight I can't help myself. I want to talk about God.
I am not religious per se, in fact I don't have a denomination, but I do believe in God. It's funny because my husband doesn't, yet we are married, in love and agree on so many other topics, so I don't see a problem with our differing views on God. I respect my husband's beliefs and I never push mine onto him. As I would never do to anyone.
People's relationships with God can change over time and I have seen people rocked by experiences and situations where they question God, or even God's existence. But in my case those times that are tough, that are scary, that are sad, I find myself asking God for help and not shunning God for what is happening. I realise God is most likely watching, waiting for me to make my epiphany. I am learning from all these experiences and I thank God for giving me the opportunity to brave them and rise above them.
I have heard people ask "Why would God do this?", "Why would God have this person die like this?" or "If God really exists, why would he hurt the good people?". Well the truth is... we all get hurt. If we didn't we wouldn't know pleasure, happiness and joy. Life would be the biggest plod along, numb journey. And the most obvious thing is... Death wouldn't exist if there were no life. Decay is just another part of the living condition. EVERYTHING decays. Yes a lot of it seems unfair... but who said life was meant to be fair?? There is no fair, no just. Some people are given many challenges in their life and others just roll on with a few hiccups. That's the way it is. No rhyme or reason. I was having a chat with my friend K and we were likening the things that have happened in our lives as cards in a card game. Everyone is dealt a different hand. So yes there are some people who get the Kings or Queens, others get 3's or 4's. But it doesn't mean those who got the so called 'crap cards' can't 'win'. It's all about how you play. It's all about viewing the cards in a different way. I feel I am rocking the hand I got dealt *insert winky face*. But I got a bad poker face hahahahaha, I've got to learn to wipe this smile off my dial!
This isn't a post on getting people to believe in God or whatever. I am simply making an observation. For me God has opened my eyes on a grand scale. I am never, ever angry with God. In fact I am grateful that God has given me the life I have been given. I am not ignorant, I am aware. You can only be super grateful for that.
I am not religious per se, in fact I don't have a denomination, but I do believe in God. It's funny because my husband doesn't, yet we are married, in love and agree on so many other topics, so I don't see a problem with our differing views on God. I respect my husband's beliefs and I never push mine onto him. As I would never do to anyone.
People's relationships with God can change over time and I have seen people rocked by experiences and situations where they question God, or even God's existence. But in my case those times that are tough, that are scary, that are sad, I find myself asking God for help and not shunning God for what is happening. I realise God is most likely watching, waiting for me to make my epiphany. I am learning from all these experiences and I thank God for giving me the opportunity to brave them and rise above them.
I have heard people ask "Why would God do this?", "Why would God have this person die like this?" or "If God really exists, why would he hurt the good people?". Well the truth is... we all get hurt. If we didn't we wouldn't know pleasure, happiness and joy. Life would be the biggest plod along, numb journey. And the most obvious thing is... Death wouldn't exist if there were no life. Decay is just another part of the living condition. EVERYTHING decays. Yes a lot of it seems unfair... but who said life was meant to be fair?? There is no fair, no just. Some people are given many challenges in their life and others just roll on with a few hiccups. That's the way it is. No rhyme or reason. I was having a chat with my friend K and we were likening the things that have happened in our lives as cards in a card game. Everyone is dealt a different hand. So yes there are some people who get the Kings or Queens, others get 3's or 4's. But it doesn't mean those who got the so called 'crap cards' can't 'win'. It's all about how you play. It's all about viewing the cards in a different way. I feel I am rocking the hand I got dealt *insert winky face*. But I got a bad poker face hahahahaha, I've got to learn to wipe this smile off my dial!
This isn't a post on getting people to believe in God or whatever. I am simply making an observation. For me God has opened my eyes on a grand scale. I am never, ever angry with God. In fact I am grateful that God has given me the life I have been given. I am not ignorant, I am aware. You can only be super grateful for that.
Thursday, 16 June 2011
Anxiety and panic...
It comes and goes in waves. I could go weeks without any form of anxiety or panic, then BAM! I start to worry about something such as an ache or pain, turning it into something more sinister in my mind. Then it takes over my entire being and I end up a wreck.
The last 2 days have been focussed on my fear of a heart attack. To some that may sound far fetched: a 31 year old woman at risk of cardiac arrest? no way. But unfortunately it is yes way. I have type 1 diabetes and it is a fact that heart disease is one of the many complications that can affect a diabetic. And the scary truth that cardiovascular disease is the leading cause of death in people with diabetes is starting to hit me bad at the moment. I am scared s***less about this. I have no idea why I have all of a sudden focussed on this. Which makes me wonder if it's intuition and it's something I need to follow up on or whether I am just letting my neurotic crazy head get the better of me. Either way I have become proactive about it and am getting all the necessary blood tests done and an ecg.
I have a feeling my worry is born from being a mother. I would not have thought of these worries 10 years ago. I need to be 100% healthy for my children's sake. They need their mum to be able to care for them, and not just in that generic way. I have Liam who literally needs me for everything. EVERYTHING. It would be selfish of me not to be selfish lol. That is how I have to look at it. I have to put my diabetes management first so I can put my children's needs next. If I don't then I won't be able to do ANYTHING for my children. This is hard as a parent, because we naturally want to put our children first and everything else follows. I am going to have to re-evaluate this...
The last 2 days have been focussed on my fear of a heart attack. To some that may sound far fetched: a 31 year old woman at risk of cardiac arrest? no way. But unfortunately it is yes way. I have type 1 diabetes and it is a fact that heart disease is one of the many complications that can affect a diabetic. And the scary truth that cardiovascular disease is the leading cause of death in people with diabetes is starting to hit me bad at the moment. I am scared s***less about this. I have no idea why I have all of a sudden focussed on this. Which makes me wonder if it's intuition and it's something I need to follow up on or whether I am just letting my neurotic crazy head get the better of me. Either way I have become proactive about it and am getting all the necessary blood tests done and an ecg.
I have a feeling my worry is born from being a mother. I would not have thought of these worries 10 years ago. I need to be 100% healthy for my children's sake. They need their mum to be able to care for them, and not just in that generic way. I have Liam who literally needs me for everything. EVERYTHING. It would be selfish of me not to be selfish lol. That is how I have to look at it. I have to put my diabetes management first so I can put my children's needs next. If I don't then I won't be able to do ANYTHING for my children. This is hard as a parent, because we naturally want to put our children first and everything else follows. I am going to have to re-evaluate this...
This is also applicable to my mental health. I need to be gentle on myself. This seems to be another aspect parents find difficult. Us parents tend to push our mental health needs to the side and hope it will all be ok. But that doesn't serve our children well. We need to be stable for our children to feel stable. At the moment I am not seeing any professionals for this. In some way I would like to, but then I think about the bad experiences I have had in the past with counsellors (how some had made me feel worse!) and I decide against it. Instead I choose to speak about it with my husband or a friend. This is an important step for anybody with mental health issues to do and one in which fellow blogger Random Ramblings of a Stay at Home Mum is very adament about. So please if you are suffering from depression, anxiety, fear, panic, deep worry... SPEAK. Words outloud are in a safer place than words stuck in your head, that can swirl and whirl, fester and feed on further fear and darkness.
Sunday, 12 June 2011
Vaccinations...
Just watched a segment on Australia's 60 Minutes about the debate on whether we should vaccinate our children or not. I can't believe it is even debateable! The pros clearly out weigh the cons, and even then I'm not sure what the cons are.... I mean I am sure there are a few cases of 'adverse reactions' as with any drugs/medications, but the possibility of diseases that have been pretty close to eradicated for decades now, coming back and taking the lives of many children, is a great reason for keeping up with immunisations.
The whole debate on whether vaccines cause Autism is laughable. And even if it did... I would rather a child with Autism than a dead baby. Now I can say that!!!!
I can't even imagine what those parents went through whose babies died of whooping cough. My heart aches for them. Watching their precious baby videos, seeing how healthy these little bubbas were and that within days they were on life support. One mum said "I would love to hear my baby cry again". And sure enough Evangeline cried tonight and I was so happy to hear it. Our babies, our children, are so precious. We need to protect them. We need to keep illnesses like Measles, Mumps, Rubella and Whooping Cough as dormant as possible, if not completely eradicated.
Just had to post this straightaway. It is something I'm passionate about.
The whole debate on whether vaccines cause Autism is laughable. And even if it did... I would rather a child with Autism than a dead baby. Now I can say that!!!!
I can't even imagine what those parents went through whose babies died of whooping cough. My heart aches for them. Watching their precious baby videos, seeing how healthy these little bubbas were and that within days they were on life support. One mum said "I would love to hear my baby cry again". And sure enough Evangeline cried tonight and I was so happy to hear it. Our babies, our children, are so precious. We need to protect them. We need to keep illnesses like Measles, Mumps, Rubella and Whooping Cough as dormant as possible, if not completely eradicated.
Just had to post this straightaway. It is something I'm passionate about.
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