Da-dah! Epiphany time!
After talking to some very amazing people and reading The Imperfect Mum's blog post on the expectations we put on ourselves (nobody else puts them on us!), I was able to gain some perspective and understanding of my situation.
I was the one thinking I should be doing this and that.
I was the one that placed the pressure on myself to be this, that and the other.
It was all in my head. And I had the power to change that!!
I know changing what goes on in your head is actually bloody hard. And I'm not saying I am a professional and what I do will be a fail safe approach to helping with that depressed, overwhelmed feeling. But I thought I would share what helped me to get through the last few weeks, or was it months?? Damn, it can screw with your sense of time.
First thing I did was: LET GO!
I stopped stressing that the dishes weren't done. They will get done. Sometime.
I stopped trying to control everything that was happening because *newsflash* you just can't!
I stopped wanting to 'fix' my children right here and right now. My main thing was to just plain enjoy them! A happy mum equals happy children. True story! If they see me stress about trying to fit in this amount of time on this amount of therapy etc, said therapy would be null and void anyways.
Second thing I did was: TAKE BABY STEPS!
Tackling things a little bit at a time. A mouse can eat a whole block of cheese as long as it nibbles, otherwise it would choke!
Writing a list, prioritising and then slowly making my way through it... or not. I make the rules. The rules that suit my life, my family, the situations and experiences I am faced with.
The last thing I did was: CHANGE MY PERSPECTIVE!
So every time my negative thoughts came through and tried to drag me down to the deep depths, I put on my ninja persona and did a judo chop.
It also helped to have such a wonderful 'cheer squad' from my friends IRL (in real life) and those in the 'blogosphere'. Support is definately a big factor in making it through such tough times, whether it be mentally or situationally (that's a real word right?!?).
Now it's time for me to move forward and KICK ASS!!!! Who else is with me?